He is Supposed to Know All, English Version
by Shirasaka Konoe
Summary: He is supposed to know all, but there is thing he doesn't. Doesn't really have a pairing, it's for you to decide if it's Izuo or Shizaya. But it's kind of yaoi, so Don't Like Don't Read. I don't really like to see flames even though I'm a pyromaniac


**Title:** He is Supposed to Know All

**Summary:** He is supposed to know all, but there is thing he doesn't.

**Pairing:** Izuo? Shizaya? Don't really know even though I made this story.

**Rate:** T

**Disclaimer:** durarara! isn't mine. But people who think it is must be really nice, eh?

**Rambling:** Well, because I'm such a lazy bum, I've only made it halfway for the translation of the second chapter of 'Their Abnormal Normal Daily Life'. Still haven't continued it until last night, and I've only translated three more paragraphs from where I left. Sad. Really, I want to cry over my pathetic laziness and pathetic determination on doing something *crying in the emo corner*. And, I've just realized, too, that I made some stupid mistakes and typos in the first chappie of that story. Gods, how I wish to be swallowed by the earth. (Still grieving over the mistake of the word 'back' becoming 'bag'. Stupid mistake. Really.)

So, rather than continuing on the mentioned story and failed because I have no motivation right now, I'll just translate my oneshots because they're short and easy (Yea, I know, I'm a cheater). Please enjoy~! :D

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Orihara Izaya is supposed to know all.

He is an informant after all; there should be nothing that he didn't know of.

He knew that the earth rotates and it revolves around the sun without being pulled and burnt to ashes to the sun, even though, well, kids also know that. But it still doesn't deny the fact that Izaya knows it.

He knows about all kinds of underground events happening right now. And, he could say that he takes part in some of them.

He knows that the only person who considers him as a friend is Shinra. Okay, Shinra was kind of freak, and sometimes scary too, especially when that underground doctor has a surgery knives gripped in his hands. But Shinra is his friend, and he knows that.

He knows where Celty's head is. Because, of course, he is the one who keeps it.

He knows that his love towards 'his' humans is… abnormal, twisted. Yes, he knows that, don't think he doesn't. And that what makes him loves those humans. Because of his twisted love.

He knows what this person likes, what that person hates, what 'he over there' is doing, what 'she over there' is doing, what is inside one's past, what will become the other's future… all. He knows. He observes it all.

Izaya also has to understand all. Again, his job as an informant requires him to.

He understands why the earth rotates. This one, maybe little kids wouldn't know. There are forces that force it to rotates, and earth revolves around the sun without burning into it because the forces called centripetal and centrifugal which worked in opposite directions; centripetal pulls the earth into the sun while centrifugal pulls the earth away from the sun. They neutralize each other and make earth doesn't get to close or too far from the sun. Simple, isn't it?

He also understands why humans do those illegal things like smuggling, drugs dealing, human trafficking, prostitution, and so on. Money is the cause. Humans need money, need it so much in order to survive. Money also controls the world. Without it, everything would just go out of control, would stop with everything left unfixable. Just like the old drunkard he decided to observe some time ago. He died of suicide, because he had too many debts he could never pay. He died. Because of money.

He understands why Shinra takes him as a friend. They were both being distanced by the others in their school. And Shinra was really happy to get a friend who he could speak to, and who didn't think he was retarded for his love of Celty. Even though Shinra, maybe, doesn't know that he knows Celty is headless.

He understands why he wants to keep Celty's head. Because he wants to control that 'angel who fell to the earth'. And as a member of 'Dollars', he will take a good care of that head.

He understands why his love towards human is twisted and distorted. Because humans are too much of interesting creatures to be loved in normal way. He loves his human and he wants to see what kind of reaction they will produce if they were to be confronted by a problem. He'd like to see if his predictions upon these humans are right or wrong. Now, that's a real form of love to him.

He also understands why he knows so much about anyone; start from the things a human likes, to the things a human hates, to the past of a human, the prediction on the future of the human… everything. It's because he always observes. And he observes because of his love towards human, again.

But, even though he hates to admit this, there is one single thing he doesn't understand. Forget understand, he doesn't even know a thing about it.

He never knows why his heart hurt so much when a certain monster named Heiwajima Shizuo, who doesn't even have the right to be called a human, let alone gets a little piece of love from him, says that he hates Izaya.

He also doesn't understand why he would break himself into tears every night because the monster hates him.

And Izaya hates one thing the most, another thing after Heiwajima Shizuo of course, or his fear towards the eyes of a dead fish.

He hates it when he doesn't understand something the most.

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And to this point, until I finished translating this story, I still don't know why I wrote it in the first place. Good kids shouldn't copy that attitude of me at home. It's dangerous (?).

And, there might be a second chapter (or even a third one, I don't know), to this story. It's mostly because I don't have the heart to make Izaya cry. Well, just maybe. Ahahahaha… :D

Well, I'll just go to the point. Left me some reviews~? Please? Also, critiques are very welcomed, just no flame. I hate to see them even though I'm some kind of pyromaniac. *insert puppy eyes*


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